[ Closing his eyes, Gaku lets out another breath. ]

Yeah, and I still have them. I think I'm always going to have them, honestly, but that just means I need to work harder.

[ He may be like his father in some ways, but he would never treat Ellis the way that his father treated his mother. ]

I want to go home and I want Ellis there with me. Getting married is the only way, so I can put those reservations aside and marry him.

[ In other words, his desires far outweigh his hesitation. ]